She has to be a great conversationalist, smart, witty, funny, and “not get embarrassed easily.” (Why are we specifying this? Again, troubled.) She has to be into sports – playing sports and watching sports – and be able to kick back with the guys. She has to be open to trying anything (I’m assuming this means sexual positions) and be outgoing and extroverted and like to go out but also like to stay in. She has to be beautiful and adventurous and also love adventure sports like ziplining and whatever the hell, and she also has to love to travel. Are those the type of characteristics these guys are looking for? Not even close. And I wrote out by hand that I am looking for an easy-going, honest, passionate guy. Now on my profile, I checked off the box saying that I want someone who wants kids and who’s single (… why I have to specify this troubles me). The real kicker here is the type of girl they are all looking for. How exactly are they ziplining regularly? And where? And how are they getting time off from work to travel all the time, at age 30? And with what money? I don’t buy it.īut that’s not even what bothers me. These guys say they are ambitious and have pretty good jobs where they are making average salaries. I live in North Carolina, 3 hours away from the mountains and 3 hours away from the beach. They are outdoors all the time, playing every sport that was ever invented, including some you’ve never heard of (sled hockey?), and they work out 5+ times a week. And of course they love traveling and frequent all these crazy places like Iceland and Belize and Egypt and Greece and the rainforests or whatever. The majority of guys on the site go on and on about all of the outdoor adventure activity they do, including mountain climbing, ziplining, white water rafting, bungee jumping, parasailing, sky diving, someone even talked about alligator wrestling. (My favorite is probably the guy whose opening line was, “Hey baby u r cute n sexy, come cuddle w me by my fireplace.” Sounds great, what’s the address?!) But there is one issue in particular I’d like to take up.ĭid you know that 99% of the guys on are adventure travelers? It seems dubious to me too, but let’s continue as if it’s true. There’s no end to what I could write about my experiences on, and I’ve only been on the site for a week. I am also at the age where apparently I better hurry up if I want kids. I’ve had an onslaught of terrible dating experiences in the last year (including someone who turned out to be a drug dealer, someone who was mad I didn’t want to come hang out at his bedbug-infested apartment, and a commitment-phobe friend who constantly appears to be doing an uncanny Jekyll and Hyde impression). One of those promises was that if I was still single at 30, I’d try online dating. I’m turning 30 in a few months, and I recently realized I’m now at the age I made a lot of promises about in the past.